When rich M. Ballon's spanish driver is found shot dead, Inspector Jacques Clouseau is the first official on the scene. All evidence suggests Maria Gambrelli, the maid, to be the murderer. But Clouseau, being attracted to the beautiful girl, is convinced that she is hiding something. So, he has her released from jail and tries to follow her secretly. Things do not work out the way the inspector wanted and people keep being murdered, and each time innocent Maria seems to be the killer. But with someone important wanting Clouseau and nobody else to cover this case, his tolerance-challenged boss Charles Dreyfuss is close to losing his mind when casualties keep turning up. And Clouseau keeps on causing trouble without knowing it... Written by Julian Reischl [email protected]

Holly Golightly is a flighty Manhattan party girl, who expects "money for the powder room as well as for cab fare" for her companionship. She has even gotten a lucrative once weekly job to visit notorious convict Sally Tomato in Sing Sing, she needing to report back to Sally's lawyer the weather report that Sally tells her as proof of her visits with him in return for payment. Her aspirations for glamor and wealth are epitomized by the comfort she feels at Tiffany's, the famous high end jewelry retailer where she believes nothing can ever go wrong. Her resolve for this wealth is strengthened, if not changed slightly in focus, upon news from home. Into Holly's walk-up apartment building and thus her life is Paul Varjak, a writer who Holly states reminds her of her brother Fred, who she has not seen in years and who is currently enlisted in the army. The two quickly become friends in their want for something outside of their current lot. Paul's situation is closer to Holly's than he ... Written by Huggo

To prove that he still is strong and powerful, Philippe Douvier decides to kill Chief Inspector Jacques Clouseau. Once Clouseau's death has been announced, the former Chief Inspector, Charles Dreyfus, feels much, much better and is released from the mental hospital. Jacques Clouseau tries to take advantage of his "death" and goes under cover with Cato to find out who tried to assassinate him. Written by Lars J. Aas [email protected]

In 1934 Paris, trained coloratura soprano Victoria Grant, a native Brit, can't get a job as a singer and is having trouble making ends meet. She doesn't even have enough money for the basics of food and shelter. Gay cabaret singer Carole 'Toddy' Todd may befall the same fate as Victoria as he was just fired from his singing gig at a second rate club named Chez Lui. To solve both their problems, Toddy comes up with what he considers an inspired idea: with Toddy as her manager, Victoria, pretending to be a man, get a job singing as a female impersonator. If they pull this scheme off, Toddy vows Victoria, as her male alter ego, will be the toast of Paris and as such be extremely wealthy. That alter ego they decide is Polish Count Victor Grazinski, Toddy's ex-lover who was disowned by his family when they found out he was gay. The Count auditions for the city's leading agent, Andre Cassell, who, impressed, gets him a gig performing in the city's best nightclub. In the audience on the ... Written by Huggo

Professional daredevil and white-suited hero, The Great Leslie, convinces turn-of-the-century auto makers that a race from New York to Paris (westward across America, the Bering Straight and Russia) will help to promote automobile sales. Leslie's arch-rival, the mustached and black-attired Professor Fate vows to beat Leslie to the finish line in a car of Fate's own invention. The Blake Edwards style of slapstick and song originated with this movie. A dedication to Laurel and Hardy appears at the beginning of the film. Edwards' tribute to Stan and Ollie can be seen most clearly in the interaction between Professor Fate and his cohort Max, as well as in the operatic Pottsdorf pie fight. Written by Jeanne Baker [email protected]

That famous jewel, The Pink Panther, has once again been stolen and Inspector Clouseau is called in to catch the thief. The Inspector is convinced that 'The Phantom' has returned and utilises all of his resources - himself and his oriental manservant - to reveal the true identity of 'The Phantom'. Written by Graeme Roy [email protected]

The Pink Panther diamond is stolen once again from Lugash and the authorities call in Chief Inspector Clouseau from France. His plane disappears en-route. This time, famous French TV reporter Marie Jouvet sets out to solve the mystery and starts to interview everybody connected to Clouseau. Each interviewee Dreyfus, Sir Charles and Lady Lytton (an ex-wife of Clouseau), George Lytton, Hercule Lajoy (assistant in "A Shot In The Dark"), and Cato tell of their run-ins with Clouseau. She is also kidnapped by mobster Bruno Langlois who doesn't want Clouseau found but she continues and finds Clouseau Sr., Clouseau's father. Is Clouseau alive or is he dead? Each interview has not-yet-seen or famous clips from the previous movies (since Peter Sellers has sadly passed away) as Marie continues to get a honest view or impression of the great French detective... Written by Lee Horton [email protected]

The trademark of The Phantom, a renowned jewel thief, is a glove left at the scene of the crime. Inspector Clouseau, an expert on The Phantom's exploits, feels sure that he knows where The Phantom will strike next and leaves Paris for Switzerland, where the famous Lugashi jewel 'The Pink Panther' is going to be. However, he does not know who The Phantom really is, or for that matter who anyone else really is... Written by Graeme Roy [email protected]

Charles Dreyfus escapes from the mental asylum and tries to kill Chief Inspector Jacques Clouseau. He doesn't succeed at first, so he takes on another strategy, namely to build a Doomsday machine and demand that someone else kills Jacques Clouseau, or Dreyfus will use the machine to wipe out whole cities and even whole countries... With about 22 assassins from all over the globe on his tail, Clouseau decides to find Dreyfus alone and put him back in the mental asylum. Written by Lars J. Aas [email protected]

Inspector Clouseau disappears, and the Surete wants the world's second best detective to look for him. However, Clouseau's enemy, Dreyfus, rigs the Surete's computer to select, instead, the world's WORST detective, NYPD Sgt. Clifton Sleigh. Sleigh obtusely bungles his way past assassins and corrupt officials as though he were Clouseau's American cousin.

By a twist of fate, clumsy still good-hearted, aspiring actor Hrundi V. Bakshi, is invited to attend Fred "General" Clutterbuck's big party, after having utterly ruined the set of his latest feature film. What Mr. Clutterbuck doesn't know, is that Bakshi is present at his gathering, merrily mingling with the highly-esteemed guests he and his wife have wholeheartedly invited. The night is approaching and all of the guests have finally assembled in this magnificent villa, equipped with the latest innovations modern technology has to offer. In this cozy and friendly atmosphere, drinks are flowing, food is in abundance and everybody is having a great time with light conversations and in high spirits, enjoying the music from the band. But when Bakshi accidentally has his first-ever sip of alcohol and his real identity is finally revealed, only God knows how this well-thought party is going to end up... Written by Nick Riganas

Kelly Sherwood is terrorized by a man with an asthmatic voice who plans to use her to steal $100,000 from the bank where she works. He threatens to kill her teenage sister Toby, if she tells the police. However she manages to contact F.B.I. agent Ripley. Written by Will Gilbert

Steve Brooks is a sexist and the prototype macho. Unfortunately one day he is killed by one of his girlfriends. In heaven, though, there is no place for men like him and he is sent back to earth in the body of a woman so that he can see how women are treated by men like the one he once was. Written by Harald Mayr [email protected]

Walter Davis is a workaholic. His attention is all to his work and very little to his personal life or appearance. Now he needs a date to take to his company's business dinner with a new important Japanese client. His brother sets him up with his wife's cousin Nadia, who is new in town and wants to socialize, but he was warned that if she gets drunk, she loses control and becomes wild. How will the date turn out - especially when they encounter Nadia's ex-boyfriend David? Written by Sami Al-Taher [email protected]

A submarine newly commissioned is damaged in the opening days of WW II. A captain, looking for a command insists he can get it to a dockyard and captain it. Going slowly to this site, they find a stranded group of Army nurses and must take them aboard. How bad can it get? Trying to get a primer coat on the sub, they have to mix white and red in order to have enough. When forced to flee the dock during an air attack, they find themselves with the world's only Pink submarine, still with 5 women in the tight quarters of a submarine. Written by John Vogel [email protected]

Felix Farmer is an extremely successful Hollywood producer, whose movies for Capitol Pictures have never lost money,... until now, with his latest, most expensive film to date, Night Wind, ending up being a major flop. The film, starring his popular Academy Award winning actress wife, Sally Miles, who has a G-rated screen image, almost bankrupts the studio. As such, the studio execs turn on Felix, who want to take over creative control of the movie and re-edit it to lessen the damage. It also turns Felix suicidal, his mental state which in turn leads to Sally leaving him and taking their two children with her. As Felix tries and tries again unsuccessfully to kill himself, he finally stumbles upon an idea which gets him out of his depression. He plans to use his and Sally's money to purchase the movie back from the studio, and re-imagine it by adding a few new scenes, to drastically altar it from the G-rated fantasy film it is, to an R-rated sex romp, complete with Sally baring her ... Written by Huggo

Marianna, a Los Angeles based therapist, tells the story of one of her patients, middle aged David Fowler, a successful sculptor. He originally came to see her due to his sudden impotence in all aspects of his life, including in his art and in his sex life, the latter especially worrisome as he has always adored women in the holistic sense, they in general who adore him right back. David's sessions with Marianna have most often been comprised of he talking about the women in his life, both past and present, those in his early life who included his single mother who had her fair share of suitors and lovers, and a plethora of prostitutes, one to who he lost his virginity and the profession which he has always treated with respect beyond the issues of many women resorting to the business as a last resort to survive. He has moved from one girlfriend/lover to another in his fear that he would miss something special in the women he has not yet met. Those women include but are not limited to... Written by Huggo

Joe Clay is a top-notch public relations man. Anything a client wants Joe can arrange for them, whether it be dancing girls or an article in a prominent magazine. Part of the job however is drinking and Joe's ability to consume alcohol seems boundless. When he meets the very pretty Kirsten Arnasen, she prefers chocolate to alcohol but Joe has a solution to that in the form of a Brandy Alexander (made up of brandy and creme de cocoa). They eventually marry but their love is insufficient to prevent them from the downward spiral that alcohol brings to them. They try desperately to break the habit but continually relapse until only one of them manages to break free. Written by garykmcd

A by-the-book Captain is ordered to capture a strategic village in Italy. The Italian soldiers are willing to surrender, if they can have a festival first. The lieutenant convinces the Captain this is the only way. Because of aerial reconnaissance, they must look like they are fighting. To sort this out an intelligence officer is sent in. Meanwhile the festival gets complicated with the Mayors daughter.